the zeppelin of burning dreams

stolen from jigs

1. Who are you?
2. Are we friends?
3. When and how did we meet?
4. How have I affected you?
5. What do you think of me?
6. What's the fondest memory you have of me?
7. How long do you think we will be friends?


10. Would you kiss me?
11. Would you hug me?
12. Physically, what stands out?
13. Emotionally, what stands out?


16. Give me a nickname and explain why you picked it.

18. How long have you known me?
19. Describe me in one word.
20. What was your first impression?
21. Do you still think that way about me now?
22. What do you think my weakness is?
23. Do you think I'll get married?
24. What makes me happy?
25. What makes me sad?
26. What reminds you of me?
27. If you could give me anything what would it be?
28. How well do you know me?
29. When's the last time you saw me?
30. Ever wanted to tell me something but couldn't?
31. Do you think I could kill someone?
32. Are you going to put this on your LiveJournal and see what I say about you?

Imagination and creativity are like knife fights in the dark. If you don't know what you're doing, you'll be hitting air most of the time.

So i call up the Philippine Graphic to find out the status of "Black Hole." Basically, I'm trying to find out if it'll be seeing publication anytime in the future. After all, they DID tell me to check in two weeks after submission.

They have a hard time finding my short story. My worry begins to mount.

Then they tell me the story had been cancelled from approval. Why? Because someone had called up the office and said that "Black Hole" would be published in another magazine.

Wha? But I never submitted that story anywhere else, unless you count the Palancas, and I sure as hell didn't win that. So what in the world is happening?!

it's impressive how the drink can change the way you handle yourself. you can see all of your imperfections, and then you can figure out retaliations / rationalizations. but then, you realize that you're only trying to make yourself more acceptable to yourself, which is actually only dragging you down to an even more bitter state of being. there's no improvement.

take me for example. i'm a silly ass when it comes to people relations. i'm brutally frank, some people actually say i'm brusque, and others go to the brink of saying i'm tactless. i mean, yeah, initially i respect those decisions, but then i go on to say that it isn't always harmful. and it isn't; it's actually helpful sometimes. but then, that's just plain stupid, since i tend to annoy more and more people that way, and not everybody's conditioned to work out exactly what i mean behind those words. it's not the annoyance part that bothers me, its the fact that when these people get annoyed, they tend to avoid the source of their annoyance, and then of course i could just shout that that's fucking stupid since the avoidance is just being used to avoid conflict whereas conflict could actually solve, better (or bitter, but hey, if things happen, they happen) the acquaintance, but i'm probably being too blunt or terrifyingly realistic with those comments. no matter how true they are, i'm usually in the wrong side of the fence.

i mean, what the fuck is up with that? my whole question here is that, is brutal reality and its avatars just so plain fucking insulting that it's worth everybody's while to just ignore the horse's mouth? hello! we've all been annoying (albeit in a more leisurely pace) at least once in our lives. people who're blunt are people voicing their cares, and you have to admit that it takes guts to actually voice their cares, so why kill the messenger? just because you don't like what you're hearing doesn't mean there isn't anything you can glean from it. some people have such a high opinion of themselves that they can't just plain sit down and think about things in a clearer sense, because they think they know better because they're blah blah blah. and i know it applies to me too (hell, i talk bigger and make less sense than most people in the world, fer chrissakes), but then, doesn't it to everybody?

i lost my point somewhere there. i started out saying how the words that spill out of your mouth can usually work against you, then i defend that train of thought by using myself as my own example.

loser, diba? tangina, don't listen to me, i'm babbling and i'm tipsy. go away.

i didn't know that ostriches kick ass.